Burnout is just feeling stressed, right?

If you're reading this, chances are you've been pushing yourself to the limit and striving for perfection in every aspect of your life. You take on immense challenges juggle a demanding career, family obligations, and personal goals, all while trying to maintain a flawless facade. Sound familiar? Then its likely you're also exhausted, irritable, and nothing seems to bring you the joy it once did.

Stress vs. Burnout: Understanding the Difference
Let's talk about stress and burnout, two terms we might use interchangeably, but are really quite different beasts. Understanding these distinctions is vital for recognizing when it's time to hit the brakes and make a change.

Stress: The Driver
Stress is like a constant hum in the background of our lives, stemming from the myriad of responsibilities we carry. It's the surge of adrenaline before a big presentation, the tight deadlines, the personal and professional expectations we set for ourselves. A certain level of stress can even be motivating, propelling us forward and helping us achieve our goals.

Think about stress the way you would hunger cues. I don’t know I’m hungry until my stomach starts to growl and alert me (well, that and my food ‘tude is a good sign too!). Those cues alert us to our need for food. We then feel motivated to go find something to munch on. Stress occurs similarly. The feeling of stress encourages us to take action to resolve the feeling. My brain is spinning about the million things I need to get done? I feel stress and this stress activates me to make changes and I start checking things off of my to-do list. In turn, I feel less stress.

But, when stress becomes overwhelming and is all too persistent, that's when the trouble begins.
Stress usually has a clear catalyst. You can pinpoint the source of your stress – be it an approaching project deadline, a conflict at work, or a seldom-rested body asking for a reprieve. The key is that stress is often tied to specific external pressures, and when those pressures ease, so does the stress.

Burnout: When the Stressor Ends But I Still Feel Overwhelmed
Burnout, on the other hand, is like a slow-burning ember that gradually consumes all your energy and passion. It's the chronic feeling of being mentally and emotionally drained mixed with detachment from the things that once fueled your fire and brought you joy. Unlike stress, burnout isn't just about feeling overwhelmed by specific situations. Instead, it's a pervasive sense of weariness which impacts every aspect of your life.
One of the defining features of burnout is feeling a decreased sense of accomplishment or efficacy in your work or personal life. This creates a self-perpetuating cycle: I’m so burned out that my performance (at work, at home, with my partner and friends) is diminished and then I feel the need to push myself harder to “do better” resulting in more burnout. Another major sign of burnout is finding yourself simply going through the motions of life devoid of the spark that used to ignite your ambitions.

Recognizing the Signs: Are You Stressed or Burnt Out?
Let’s talk about the difference between the two. Knowing how to recognize what’s stress and what’s burnout can help you in taking action.

1. What’s the source: When you're stressed, you can identify the specific triggers, like a looming project or a strained relationship. However, burnout has a stealthier origin, seeping into your life gradually and affecting your overall well-being. It may be hard to pinpoint a direct stressor and everything seems to make you feel overwhelmed.

2. Energy levels: Stress can leave you feeling fatigued, for sure, but burnout takes it to another level. It's a deep, bone-weary exhaustion that doesn't lift, regardless of how much sleep you get or how many vacations you take.

3. Mental and emotional toll: While stress might make you feel anxious or irritable, burnout can manifest as a pervasive feeling of emptiness, cynicism, and a lack of motivation. It’s irritability on the next level - where even the smallest thing can set you off and it takes time to recover. I often hear clients describe burnout as feeling like they’re depressed, without the sadness.

4. Apathy: When you're burnt out, you might feel apathetic, indifferent, and detached from the things that used to excite you whereas stress tends to leave you feeling agitated and on edge. Stress typically has an action urge attached, where we want to make changes to relieve the feeling of stress. Burnout leaves us feeling as if we don’t want to do anything at all.

Overcoming Burnout
If you've recognized the telltale signs of burnout in your own life, don’t panic! Change can happen. You don’t have to live like this forever (or even very much longer). You’ve already taken a fantastic first step by noticing how you feel. You took the time to make your way here learn more and shake things up. Go you!

I want you to first start by acknowledging that burnout is not a personal failing but a consequence of an unbalanced lifestyle and relentless self-imposed pressure and perfectionism. Working through burnout is not about giving up on your dreams and ambition, it's about realigning your priorities with your values and overcoming your perfectionism to reclaim your well-being.
You’re going to want to start building strategies to change your life so that you can beat the burnout. recharge. In the end, it's about choosing to live a life that's fulfilling, not just busy. Business and moving from one goal to the next is not a life of joy.

To begin, you’ll want to become attuned to your top values are and why they feel important to you. This allows you the space to start to align your actions with your values. Knowing and action on your values also helps you break free of the hustle culture and start to challenge perfectionism. You’ll need to embrace strategies like setting healthy boundaries, learning to say no, and actively practicing self-care. If you’re feeling stuck or unsure how to start, I’d recommend you consider seeking support from a mentor, coach, or therapist who specializes in burnout to help you jumpstart your recovery.

Remember, your worth is not determined by your productivity, and it's okay to give yourself permission to rest.